Bob and Ray’s mode of operation is simple. They break in to your home. In a matter of minutes they boost your gems. Then, they hang around your house and play. To keep you on your toes after they’ve gone, they leave little surprises you’ll be finding for months. In a way stealing gems is a sideline for the duo. Exposing the secrets of their absent victims is the main event.

Betty is a 60-something police detective with a reputation for cracking the toughest criminals. Her interrogation methods “out-psych” even her most pathological clients. Exuding a mature sexuality, Betty uses attraction and rejection with surgical precision. She knows it’s all about power and getting into the perpetrator’s head. Though everyone in the department views Betty as a loose cannon, they can’t argue with the success of her approach. As a result colleagues cut her a wide path.

When they come head-to-head with Betty, Bob and Ray are inexplicably in a mood to confess. In a series of flashbacks the duo relates a litany of home invasions. In one house they party with Alice, a severely retarded woman that they discover locked in a bedroom. They play Siskel and Ebert to a homeowner’s stash of amateur porn tapes in a suburban split-level. They’re surprised in a palatial Victorian by a hapless appliance repairman who wants to join their gang. His offer unwittingly offends the duo, inspiring Ray to play a round of golf using the repairman’s head and a nine-iron.

Apparently Betty is uninterested in Bob and Ray’s exploits. Instead, she evokes bizarre psychodramas designed to crack the duo psychologically. To improve Bob’s self-image she meticulously combs his hair and gives him a shave. When he makes an offhand comment regarding her handy work, she slaps him with a force that nearly knocks him to the floor. She lavishes attention on Ray and demands that he dance with her. As she hums “Misty” they foxtrot around Bob who suddenly sobs with emotional release. Throughout, Betty’s mood swings are so erratic that she’s able to play “good cop/bad cop” almost simultaneously.

By the time the interrogation reaches its climax both men are basket cases. Confident she’s cracked the duo, Betty is gently massaging their fragile psyches when an evidence technician delivers scores of prescription bottles taken from the duo’s impounded van. Bob and Ray immediately snap out of their apparent emotional distress and cheerfully explain that the prescriptions are anti-psychotics. When Betty realizes that the duo is certifiably insane and can’t be prosecuted, she flies into an incendiary rage that takes her to the brink of great bodily harm.

Betty is hauled away. Bob and Ray gleefully reveal the method behind their madness and are shipped back to the state mental hospital for the criminally insane.



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